The Good Ol' Days
When someone says the phrase, "the good ol' days," what do you think of? Here are a few things that come to my mind.
Standing on the pitcher's mound under the lights on a Saturday night in a small town by the river, with a crowd that felt and sounded as big as Riverfront Stadium (for you millennials, that's the old Cincinnati Reds ballpark). Wiping the sweat from my brow and peering into the catcher's mitt just before making the final pitch of the Big Bend Championship. I can still hear Coach Hemsley's raspy voice shout, "Heat it up!" Joe-Bob, as we called him, was one of the best coaches I ever had. The good ol' days.
Stepping up to the line of scrimmage in my back yard with my little brother, both of us decked out in football gear. The Dallas Cowboys vs. the Cleveland Browns. The "all-time quarterback" was a neighbor friend who was six years older than us. He was in high school and played on the varsity team when we were in elementary school. He was tough. He was cool. He was popular. Yet, he invested time and genuine interest in us. He taught us a great deal about confidence and drive to be our best. I might have admired players like Pete Rose or Roger Staubach, but Biz, as we called him, was a true role model. He was a high school athlete that we knew and spoke to every day. We watched him play and saw how he interacted with his parents as well as with his friends. We learned more from him than he might ever realize today. He was a big part of our good ol' days.
Standing next to the desk of one of my 3rd grade classmates waiting for Mrs. Stearns to turn over the flashcard that would reveal a math problem. I prided myself at being able to calculate the correct answer before my classmates, moving along from desk to desk in a game of "Math Wars." Full disclosure, that was basic math, which I was pretty good at solving. A few years later when Mr. Bear introduced us to something called "variables," my math skills declined. Or maybe it was my growing interest in girls. Who knows... but those were the good ol' days.
I'll bet you could tell some stories, too. We all can. Everyone has good ol' days. We think back to those days and they make us smile. But it isn't just "days" or "events" that cause us to remember them as good ol' days. Somewhere in those memories there is a person, or people, that made those days significant. It was the way someone taught us how to do something we had never learned before. It was the way someone invested genuine interest and time with us during difficult moments. It was the way someone instilled a life skill in us that we still carry with us today. It was the way someone coached us. It was the way someone taught us. It was the way someone befriended us. It was the way someone chose to be there with us.
These are the things the good ol' days are made of.
Now, let's fast-forward to today. I want to say something to coaches, teachers, parents, high school athletes or anyone and everyone else who has influence on young people in any way. Please consider this:
Today you are helping to create someone else's "good ol' days."
We love our good ol' days. But those are ours, and they are done. Now, today, we have the opportunity to help make good ol' days for someone else. What an awesome privilege! How are we doing?
Coach, you are either going to be part of someone's good ol' days, or you are going to be a distant memory. And let me tell you a secret, the difference has nothing to do with how much you know the game.
Teachers, you are either going to be part of the good ol' days, or you are going to be someone your students would just as soon forget. The difference is not in how well you knew and taught the content standards.
Parents, you will inevitably be part of the good ol' days because you are implanted in them. The difference will not be in how good of a friend you were to your child, but in how well you instilled a mix of discipline, accountability, responsibility and love into them as they grow and mature and begin to learn how to develop these things on their own.
High school students and especially high school athletes, you are part of someone else's good ol' days whether you want to be or not. Kids look up to you. You once looked up to someone, so you know this is true. In fact, there is a really good chance that many of the decisions you make today are determined through a lens of what you believe someone you once looked up to would do.
We do this all the time, sometimes consciously but often subconsciously. We like to think that we make choices solely based on our own judgment, belief and free-will, but the reality is that we are all heavily influenced by someone else. Usually that person is a coach, a teacher, a parent, a friend or someone older that we have looked up to.
Every one of us, at some point or another, is part of another person's good ol' days, whether we like it or not and whether we want to be or not. It's the just way the world turns. Think for a moment, what are those days going to look like for the kids you are coaching, teaching, or mentoring when they look back on them 20 years from now?
Why is it important for us to think about this? Because, when we are conscious of this we make decisions about how we are going to lead and influence these young people based more on long-term goals rather than short-term goals. You see, good ol' days are long term memories. There are a lot of moments you cannot remember about your younger years of playing sports or going to school. And here is the interesting thing about all the moments you can't remember. There is a really good chance they were things that seemed like a really big deal to you at the time. You struck out to end the game. You made a big error that cost your team. Someone made fun of you. A girl broke your heart. You got an F on a test.
There are lots of things we have all experienced that, in the short-term, seemed like they were monumental issues. However, now you can't even remember them. Why? Because they don't matter. In the grand scheme of things, they just haven't mattered much.
Coaches, be the kind of coach that coaches the long-term. That doesn't mean we ignore the short-term goals and instruction. It just means we always keep perspective that one day these days will be "good ol' days."
Teachers, be the kind of teacher that teaches the long-term. Of course you can't just ignore the short term lessons, but never forget that you are shaping and molding people, not just brains. One day they will look back and remember. And when they do, what will they think of? Here is something to consider. People rarely ever remember and follow a TEACHING, but they will always remember and follow a TEACHER.
Friends, let's be more focused on the long-term influence we have on one another.